Religious salespeople

Jesus Christ! (meant to be funny) I was just interrupted by a Jehova’s Witness… in Tokyo, Japan… I would have thought living in a country whose population is mostly vaguely un-religious would prevent me from suffering the proselytizing of others, but we get Jehova’s Witnesses, Mormons, Soka Gakkai (a political-religious organization here in Japan) and any other number of people coming by to “save my soul”.

Seriously, I don’t begrudge anyone their beliefs, and religious beliefs play little to no part in my interactions with other people, but leave me alone. My soul is fine, if it’s not, my business. Seriously. Thank you for your concern and your selfless want (oxymoron?) to prevent me from eternal hellfire/oblivion/ignorance/whatever, but I will pass.

A few years ago, when I still lived out in the boondocks, one of the most interesting visits (in a “ha ha, can’t believe this” kind of way) I had was one where they had this incredibly attractive young lady knock on the doors and stand in perfect view of the peepholes, while this wacky old bat hid next to the door until you had peeped the beautiful girl and opened the door (being the single young guy that I was at the time) when the old bat would leap between you and the young girl and shove pamphlets in your face and proselytize. They didn’t even have the decency to seem embarrassed by what they were doing (essentially using sex to sell religion).

Seriously. Attention all overzealous, preachy religious types: please leave me alone. You want to be friends, neighbors, whatever, fine. Let’s just leave the religion out of it. Freedom of religion also means freedom from religion and freedom from your religions in particular.

I mean, I could understand them maybe not realizing I had this viewpoint except for the fact that I have a sign on the goddamn (irony! hah!) front door saying “No religious or sales solicitations wanted or accepted” which they ignore and then having to say no thank you 15 times or else just shutting the door on them before they give up. Please do not mistake my politeness as interest in what you are selling.

Good day.

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